There is an expression…”My heart is full”. Many think they are using this in the right way. I think it is sad, selfish, and true of someone who hasn’t lived long enough or known true love, pain, or loss.
When you Love someone, you know it because it feels like they take a part of you when they leave. And, you feel like you’re whole again when they are near.
When you Lose someone you Loved, you can never get that piece of yourself back. You can grieve and mourn and eventually, that hole will heal but it will never be replaced. You go on through life knowing that a part of you is missing, and every now and then, it aches.
Same as when someone hurts you. I don’t mean physically, although it can hurt just as bad. But when someone you Love causes you pain, real Pain, it feels like they reached in and took a piece of your heart while it’s beating…and they did. You can forgive, but you will never forget because that piece of you they took stays with them as a reminder. Now, whenever you see them, hear their name, or think of them…that piece of you calls out to you no matter how far away.
Even people you have never met before can take a piece of you if you let them. Religious people, cultists, and fanatics give a part of themselves willingly to the subject of their faith or cause. Celebrities are also recipients of pieces of multitudes of people. Fame provides, whether you want it or not.
I’m guilty of giving several pieces to various people I’ve known along the way. Some I regret and of others, I’m proud. But there are these pieces that belong to a few I have never met, and yet, they have them all the same.
One of my early childhood crushes was Minnie Riperton, as I’m sure I’m not alone. But when she passed from cancer, I could feel a piece of me go with her. I’d known personal loss and love, even at that young age, but it was the first time someone I’d never met was responsible.
Malcolm, Martin, and Medgar also have pieces that defy space and time, often transporting me to the ballroom, balcony, and block making me feel pain repeatedly.
Marvin received one as soon as his father pulled that trigger, although we all thought it was an April Fool’s joke…a sick one, not at all funny, but we tried to laugh all the same. Hoping it could not be true, but the pain told us it was so very real.
So, today, June 7th…when we are celebrating your birthday Around The World. A day when there should be Joy in Repetition. I am instantly transported back to The Time when there was an April Snow, an Elevator was bringing me down, and A Purple Piece of me was crying again, For You.
D Jay Collins 